Enlightened Cartoons

“Women are like cell phones.
They like to be held and talked to, but push the wrong button, and you’ll be disconnected.”

“When you’re in jail, a good friend will be trying to bail you out.
A best friend will be in the cell next to you saying, ‘Damn, that was fun.'”

“It’s no longer a question of staying healthy.
It’s a question of finding a sickness you like.”

-Jackie Mason

“Do not try to solve all life’s problems at once,
learn to dread each day as it comes.”

-Donald Kaul

“The only function of economic forecasting
is to make astrology look respectable.”

-John Kenneth Galbraith

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